As in everything else including fashion, we tend to find our own distinctive style, a look that is all our own.
At some point, our own understanding and awareness of ourselves... "Hey, this is who I am." It could be a classic, casual chic or fusion wear and it could be high fashion.Seeking to define our distinctive look, we often begin by imitating trendy friends or fashionable icons.
It is only when we discover our true identity that we craft our individual style to become originals rather than wannabes.Once we know who we are internally, then our style statement will also emanate a certain inner essence expressed through all of a piece with who we are. At the beginning of our style journey, though, when we are still looking for ways to be, we do the reverse, which is to piece together an identity through the way we dress.
The more expensive the outfit, the more confident we feel about who we are. The more we copy trends, the safer we feel about our clothes. At this stage we are very vulnerable to brands and fashion trends because we have a great need to belong and to be endorsed.
A huge part of our identity derives from being fashionable or from having the money to dress in top-line clothing. Through our invulnerable armour of fashionable perfection, we survey the rest of humanity through the same parameter. Individuals who dress like us pass the test and those whose clothing is unbranded or not trendy are dismissed without further ado.
Indeed, one quick way of figuring out how far we have travelled on our path of finding our true self is to see how dependent we are on brands. How do we feel when we wear a branded pair of jeans? How do we feel when we don't? If a great deal of our confidence comes from 'magic names', we may be sure we have to work on ourselves.
I am not implying that people who have found their identity stop wearing brands. They might still choose to wear brands but their identities are not a function of the labels they flaunt. They will not be diminished if they are not wearing a brand. They are free - to discover their own inclinations, likes and dislikes, independent of whether they are in fashion or not and they will not judge others on the basis of whether they wear brands or not.
Indeed, we become originals rather than wannabes only when we discover our own style, which, as I said before, goes in tandem with the discovery of our own identity.
How do we discover our identity? By finding that we can survive - and even thrive on - the tests of life. By discovering our self-worth and self-respect. By connecting with our values, what we stand for and believe in. Gradually, like a figure rising out of the morning mist, we form. Instead of miming others' opinion about issues, we proffer our own. We daringly go out on a limb for things we believe in. We discover that we have skills and talents that others value and appreciate.
We find that we like ourselves - a lot. And gradually, we discern the shades that suit us, the styles that flatter us and those that do not, the fabric that feels right for us, the looks that we identify with. Eventually, our wardrobes begin to fuse around these factors. People around us begin to notice and comment on our dress sense and often bring us little trinkets and clothes which are 'so you'. Best of all, they begin to imitate us! Knowing who we are gives us the freedom to experiment. We are no longer afraid of looking outlandish or different.
When you discover your individual style, you just can't be beat…because you stand alone, facing the mirror.
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